Christmas Crappers
The latest acquisition to the Irvine household is a figurine of Scotland's First Minister, Alex Salmond, taking a dump or having a crap, would you believe?
Now before anyone takes offence or thinks this is disrespectful - it is not, quite the opposite, in fact.
Because the portrayal of important public figures in this way is a sign of affection in Catalonia - where it is regarded as a great leveller, from a Cat to a King, in the sense that everyone has to poop, and preferably once a day.
And 'Caganers' (the Crappers) as these little figures are known are especially important at Christmas time - and anyone who's anybody from President Obama, to the Pope to Her Madge the Queen has their image reproduced in this fashion.
So far, no one's has asked permission to produce a 'Caganer' of Mark Irvine - but if anyone out there is interested I can be reached at: markirvine@compuserve.com