Water the Workers' Beer
Now here's a really funny cartoon by Brian Adcock in Scotland on Sunday on which the cartoonist has lavished a lot of thought and care.
The grumpy looking 'pub landlady' in the foreground is none other than Johann Lamont, leader of the Scottish Labour Party, while in the background unseen Labour MPs are busy watering down the pub's beer.
Now this is a metaphor for a huge row which has broken out in the Labour Party over increasing the powers of the Scottish Parliament, as a means of undermining support for a Yes vote in this year's independence referendum.
But the problem is that some vocal Labour voices are not in favour of this idea because they fear it will lead to independence by stealth or default, if more powers are transferred from Westminster to Holyrood, as this will effectively do London MPs and the House of Lords out of their jobs.
So, the Labour Party is tying itself in knots as it tries to face in a number of different directions at the same time - here is the famous song by Paddy Ryan about 'The Man that Waters the Workers' Beer'.
Who said that politics is boring - because I think it's hugely funny.
The Man that Waters the Workers' Beer
By Paddy Ryan
I'm the man, the very fat man, / that waters the workers' beer. /
Yes, I'm the man, the very fat man, / that waters the workers' beer. / What do I care if it makes them ill / or it makes them terribly queer? / I've a car, a yacht, and an aeroplane, / and I waters the workers' beer.
Now, when I make the workers' beer, / I puts in strychinine, /
Some methylated spirits, / and a drop of paraffin. /
But since a brew so terribly strong / might make them terribly queer, / I reaches my hand for the water tap, / and I waters the workers' beer.
I'm the man, the very fat man, / that waters the workers' beer. /
Yes, I'm the man, the very fat man, / that waters the workers' beer. / What do I care if it makes them ill / or it makes them terribly queer? / I've a car, a yacht, and an aeroplane, / and I waters the workers' beer.
A drop of beer is good for a man / who's thirsty, tired, and hot. /
And sometimes I have a drop for myself / from a very special lot. /
But a fat and wealthy working class / is the thing that I most fear, /
So I reaches my hand for the water tap, / and I waters the workers' beer.
I'm the man, the very fat man, / that waters the workers' beer. /
Yes, I'm the man, the very fat man, / that waters the workers' beer. / What do I care if it makes them ill / or it makes them terribly queer? / I've a car, a yacht, and an aeroplane, / and I waters the workers' beer.
Now ladies fair beyond compare, / be ye maid or wife, /
Oh, sometimes lend a thought for one / who leads a wand'ring life. /
The water rates are shockingly high, / and chemicals are so dear, /
So there isn't the profit there used to be / when I waters the workers' beer.
By Paddy Ryan
I'm the man, the very fat man, / that waters the workers' beer. /
Yes, I'm the man, the very fat man, / that waters the workers' beer. / What do I care if it makes them ill / or it makes them terribly queer? / I've a car, a yacht, and an aeroplane, / and I waters the workers' beer.
Now, when I make the workers' beer, / I puts in strychinine, /
Some methylated spirits, / and a drop of paraffin. /
But since a brew so terribly strong / might make them terribly queer, / I reaches my hand for the water tap, / and I waters the workers' beer.
I'm the man, the very fat man, / that waters the workers' beer. /
Yes, I'm the man, the very fat man, / that waters the workers' beer. / What do I care if it makes them ill / or it makes them terribly queer? / I've a car, a yacht, and an aeroplane, / and I waters the workers' beer.
A drop of beer is good for a man / who's thirsty, tired, and hot. /
And sometimes I have a drop for myself / from a very special lot. /
But a fat and wealthy working class / is the thing that I most fear, /
So I reaches my hand for the water tap, / and I waters the workers' beer.
I'm the man, the very fat man, / that waters the workers' beer. /
Yes, I'm the man, the very fat man, / that waters the workers' beer. / What do I care if it makes them ill / or it makes them terribly queer? / I've a car, a yacht, and an aeroplane, / and I waters the workers' beer.
Now ladies fair beyond compare, / be ye maid or wife, /
Oh, sometimes lend a thought for one / who leads a wand'ring life. /
The water rates are shockingly high, / and chemicals are so dear, /
So there isn't the profit there used to be / when I waters the workers' beer.
